Demons R Us and Other Stories
Author: Alice Gaines
Cover Art: Sahara Kelly
BIN: 04848-01557
Genres: Action Adventure, Box Sets, Paranormal, Romance
Themes: Dark Desire/Horror, Elves, Dragons & Magical Creatures, Magic, Sorcery, and Witchcraft
Series: Demons R Us (#0)
Book Length: Box Set
Page Count: 263
From the author: Welcome to my mind. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to share a bed with two demons who don't much like each other? Do you ever wonder if the nice lady at the orchid nursery has a second identity as Avenger of the Non-Orgasmic? If a man had a cat door in his house, would you expect a fairy to sneak in through it to check him out? Could a little green man be really good in bed? And what if you had two drop-dead gorgeous twins competing to mate with you? I think of these sorts of things all the time. Enjoy the madness...
The Demons R Us collection includes the previously published titles Demons R Us, Eria's Ménage, Fairy in my Bed, Sexation, and The Adventures of Wonderslut. Please note that not all genres and themes apply to the entire collection.
"This story is loaded with erotic love scenes with two very capable demons and a great deal of humor."
-- Maura Frankman, The Romance Studio
"In Demons R Us, Ms. Gaines has created some really good dialog, hot demons and steamy sex, not to mention some new positions (do not try these at home!). This entertaining story has me looking for more by this author."
"Demons R Us is every woman's erotic dream come true. Alice Gaines has a way with words, a flair for the sensual and a great sense of humor."
"Demons R Us is diabolically funny and loaded with enough double-demon-on-girl action that Vicky, Asmodai and Ilbris could have shot their own porn flick...Ms. Gaines gets an A+ for her delivery and sheer naughtiness."
"Tremendous! Ms. Gaines captures the feel of a foreign fantasy world, the complications of love versus duty, and the high eroticism of three perfect mates in this captivating short story... Readers will find Eria's Ménage a wonderful short read. Go out and pick it up today!"
-- Dandelion, Whipped Cream
"Sizzling sex and tasty testosterone make their mark in Eria's Ménage, written by talented author Alice Gaines. Lead character Eria doesn't comes across as a strong ruler but Tad and Brath practically ooze raw male lust right off the page. Entertaining and hot, Eria's Ménage hits the spot, the g-spot that is!"
"La Petit Morte! Romantic, fun and a total kick, Fairy in My Bed rocks!"
"Sparks fly when these memorable characters get together and you're in for a hot ride. If you're looking for something to read that can fit in to any schedule, this is an imaginative story that will leave you smiling."
"Alice Gaines has written a hilarious short story in her latest book Fairy In My Bed. From the moment when Steve Murray's cat faces off with a twelve inch fairy until the last sexy page you will laugh yourself silly!"
"Sexation shows the conflicts of a normal marriage and how the alien helped Carly and Randall remember the more passionate side to life. Great Job!!!"
"This is one of those books that's a real joy to read. It should give any reader more smiles than you've had for a while."
-- Dee Daily, The Romance Studio
"Ms. Gaines has unraveled an entire new world where everything is possible! The story is funny and sexy and I have found myself taken by it, having to read it without putting it down!"
"Alice Gaines has managed to merge the world of the comic book with the world of the erotic novel, producing a wonderful and intriguing book."
Demons R Us
Alice Gaines
All rights reserved.
Copyright ©2011 Alice Gaines
First, they make you take a vow until death do you part, and then, they won't let you kill the bastard. Vicky Burke planned to divorce her dearly beloved the minute a judge signed the court order. In the meantime, she needed to get him out of her house.
She pressed the buzzer at the front gate again and put her mouth up to the intercom. "I know you're listening to this, Stewart, and I know what you're doing in there."
After a few more seconds of silence, she pushed the button and held it down. She'd lived in there for years before she'd met Stewart and had heard the unholy noise the bell made. Not even the sociopath she'd married could put up with it forever. Finally, static came out of the speaker.
"If you want to see me, talk to Lorelei," Stewart said.
"I'm not calling my own secretary to make an appointment with my own husband." Ex-husband and former secretary, ever since she'd caught the two of them doing the nasty in Stewart's Jaguar after the company holiday party.
"Suit yourself." The speaker clicked off.
She pushed the button again, and this time she leaned on it. Lorelei was probably in there with Stewart, and with any luck, the buzzing would give her a migraine. It made sense in a perverted way for Stewart to settle back into her house while she visited London on business, but what in hell had possessed him to move his bimbo in with him? He had to know she'd put their butts back on the street the minute she got home. She'd been home for days now, though, and the butt removal had proved a lot harder than she'd expected. To make matters worse, she'd had an earful from Mrs. Radnich, the neighborhood snoop, about some truly raunchy goings-on since her erstwhile love lizard had slithered back. That crap had to stop.
The speaker came to life again, so she removed her finger from the buzzer.
"What can I do for you?" Stewart practically trilled it. Phony as all hell, as usual.
"You can get the fuck out of my house."
"But, dearest, you told me when we got married that it would be our love nest."
Ye gods, had she really called a ten-bedroom, twelve-bath stucco villa with pool, tennis court, and six-car garage a nest? Probably, back when the asshole had her convinced the sun rose and set in his eyes.
"Cut the BS, Stewart. You know you hate my guts."
"Pot. Kettle. Black."
"Listen, Stewart, you can be my ex-husband or my late husband. Your choice."
"Is that a threat?" he said.
"Take it however you want, but you will vacate the premises."
He heaved a sigh so loud it crackled over the wires and came out the speaker on her end. "I can see I have to explain things to you."
"Just try."
"I'll be right out." The speaker went dead.
Vicky walked to the gate and tried it. Still locked. The asshole wouldn't even let her onto her own property to talk to him. She shook the metal like a crazed zoo ape, but the lock held, of course. Her own security system. How humiliating.
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